The bad news about good news
I’m still in a bit of shock.
Yesterday I was contacted by someone about having two of my pieces published in an upcoming book. I actually put two books in a box today and mailed them off. It freaked me out.
I’m still freaking out.
Part of me is so happy that I’m afraid to believe it’s true until I have a copy of the published book in my hands. In fact, I’m terrified that I’ll jinx the whole thing just by talking about it.
I think that the news came at both the best and the worst time. Last week, I found out that I wasn’t accepted into the Paper and Book Intensive. Quite honestly, I’m heartbroken. Needless to say, I’ve been feeling a bit emotionally raw ever since I got my rejection.
So then I get an Email about my work being included in a book. Under normal circumstances, I’d be on the moon. Unfortunately, I’ve been on vacation in Ick Land and I’m having a hard time getting a convenient flight out of here. In case you’re wondering, Ick Land is not close to the moon.
I think that I also might be feeling extra vulnerable because the chosen pieces have significant personal value. I don’t do much one-of-a-kind work and what I do create is pretty meaningful to me – I don’t sell them for just this very reason. I’m hoping that I’ll feel better once my books are received and I get a yes-this-is-really-just-what-I’m-looking-for Email.
Am I the only one who has such a difficult time with situations like this?